Dear Diary,
My secretary returned last week. Apparently, she said she didn't want things to be over between us. I don't know what that means. are you allowed to just... un-fire yourself?
She's been sticking very close to me. I think it's working! She's going to pull a knife one of these days, and then I'll finally die! This is a win if I've ever seen one.
I also learned her name. It's Vamres Eltan. That's a nice name. I'm sure it'll sound good as the next Grand Wizard. 60th Grand Wizard, Vamres Eltan. That has a ring to it.
When I mentioned that to her, she said, "It doesn't have a ring yet," and winked at me. So it really is true... she is finally going to put me out of my misery! These seven months have been torturous, so this is wonderful news.
This would be a good month then... if not for the frisbee. Yeah, remember the frisbee? Well, this time some wise-ass decided to throw it all the way up through my office window. Broke all the glass and everything. But that's fine, right?
I was looking out the window at the time. I am currently in the infirmary, nursing glass wounds across my entire body. But it's fine, in this weakened state, Vamres can kill me easily.
Your Soon-to-be-Dead Grand Wizard,
Felonius Questus
